You'll have to speak up.

"You'll have to speak up, I'm a bit deaf and I've not got my hearing aid in".

WHY??? If you're deaf, you know you're deaf, you actually have got a hearing aid and you know you're going to be in a situation where conversation will occur, then why the fuck aren't you wearing it?!?!

It's sooooo common too.

I really don't know why so many old people do it. It's gotta be a toss-up between forgetfulness or denial of being old and useless. It really does drive me up the bloody wall sometimes. Fair enough, I do like shouting at customers but I'd rather it was abuse and orders to fuck off instead of the banal kinda crap I've gotta shout at these deafies. It's not restricted to hearing aids either. Probably more common (but admittedly less annoying) are the people who never have their reading glasses with them when they need to fill in a form or something. Hearing aids and glasses are not exactly completely critical items but they do kinda help people live their lives a bit. Personally I'm looking forward to the day when I hear someone say "You'll have to come and pick me up. I'm a paraplegic but I've not got my wheelchair." It's inevitable.